Clean Jokes
A old millionaire decides to get married
An old, blue-blooded, millionaire decides that he wants to get married, but he wants to marry a pure.
One is not so easy to find in this day and age,
But he starts scouring the country in search of his pure.
After a few months of looking, the millionaire is out on a date one night, and he thinks he may have finally found his honey.
The woman seems extremely innocent, so after dinner, as they’re riding in the back of his limousine, the man whips out his weapon.
“Oh my goodness!” exclaims the woman.
“What in the world is that?”
“You don’t know what this is?” asks the millionaire.
“Oh, no!” replies the woman. “I’ve never seen anything like that in my whole life!”
The man puts his tool away, reaches over, and starts hugging the woman.
“I love you!” he cries.
“I’m going to marry you! I’m going to make you the richest, happiest woman in the whole world!”
A month later they get married.
On their wedding night in the hotel room, the husband sits down on the bed next to his wife.
He pulls out his tool and says to her,
“Are you sure you’ve never seen anything like this?”
“Never,” says the woman, her eyes wide with wonder.
“Well,” explains the man, “this is my weapon.”
“No, it’s not!” says the woman, in total disbelief.
“It’s not?” asks the puzzled millionaire.
“No,” answers his wife.
“weapon are twelve inches and black!”