A man goes in to a bar.
He approaches the bartender.
“Hi mate. Listen, I don’t have any cash on me at the moment, do you think you can spot me a pint?”
The bartender scoffs. “No chance mate, we’re not here for that.”
The man pauses for a moment, and then makes an offer. “What if I show you something that you’ve never seen before?
If you’ve never seen it, all my drinks are on the house for the night.”
“Pfft,” the barman scoffs. “Yeah, alright. Let’s see what you’ve got.”
The man reaches in to his bag and pulls out a frog, and a tiny piano.
He sets them on the bar, the frog hops over to the piano and starts to play a beautiful rendition of Mozart’s Die Zauberflöte.
The barman is stunned. “Well, I’ll be! You’ve got something there, I’ll give you that. Fair enough mate, drinks are on me…but I want the frog and the piano. How about 1,000 for them?”
“I couldn’t do that. The frog is my livelihood.”
How about 2,000?”
The man spends the entire night drinking, partying away, and stumbles home at closing time.
Fast forward a few days, and the same man returns.
“Listen mate. I’ve spent all the money you gave me and I’m strapped for money again. Any chance of spotting me for a pint?”
The barman says, “No, we already went through this. We’re not a charity.”
“Ahh, but what if I show you something you’ve never seen before?”
The barman is amused. “You came here last with a frog that plays a piano, I’ve seen it all! But go on then, what have you got?”
The man pulls out a mouse and sets it on the bar.
It sits there, looking around and minding his own business.
“That’s just a mouse! I’ve got enough mice to deal with, I don’t need another one!”
The mouse pipes up. “Just a mouse?! I’ll have you know I’ve been quite well educated, sir!”
The barman jumps back.
“The mouse…the mouse just spoke! It’s a talking mouse! Listen mate, all your drinks are on the house, but I’ve got to have the mouse as well! I will give you 3,000 for him!”
The man accepts the money, and continues his evening of free drinks.
But as the night goes on, and the man gets more belligerent, he stumbles over to the bar to talk to the barman.
“Listen mate, here’s you 3,000 back. I feel terrible about what I’ve done.”
The barman scoffs. “Sorry mate, but a deal is a deal, and I’ve bought the mouse off you fair and square. I’m keeping him!”
The man says, “I don’t care, just please take the money. It was all a trick! The mouse doesn’t talk…the frog is a ventriloquist.”