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A man came home from work, sat down in his favorite chair, turned on the TV, and said to his wife, “Quick, bring me a beer...
Little Johnny got his first job running the register at a store. The old store owner said he would teach him how to up-sell. “Watch how...
Husband and wife are getting all snugly in bed. The passion is heating up. But then the wife stops and says, “I don’t feel like it,...
A drunk staggers into a diner and orders a couple of eggs. The waiter, suspecting that they’ve run out, goes back to question the chef. “Hey,...
Two young brothers were spending the night at their grandparents’ home. When it was time for bed, the two boys knelt down and began to say...
Little Johnny asks his father for a $200 bicycle for his birthday. Johnny’s father says, “We have an $80,000 mortgage on the house, and I just...
A couple is celebrating their golden wedding anniversary. The husband takes the opportunity to ask his wife whether in all their years together she had ever...
One evening a husband, thinking he was being funny, said to his wife. “Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in Slim Fast. Maybe it would...
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even...
A strange old lady has moved into my house. I have no idea who she is, where she came from, or how she got in. I...
A man had been driving all night and by morning was still far from his destination. He decided to stop at the next city he came...
An old man was sitting in a private box at a major football match with an empty seat next to him: A young enthusiast saw the...
Two Irish nuns have just arrived in the USA by boat, and one says to the other, “I hear that the people in this country actually...
The elderly priest, speaking to the younger priest, said. “You had a good idea to replace the first four pews with plush bucket theater seats. It...
It was a bitter divorce, after four years of marriage and two children it was over. Sam showed up in court together with his ex to...
An elderly woman joins a country club and when she hears the guys talking about their golf round, she says, “I played on my college’s golf...
An elderly woman had just returned to her home from an evening of Church services when she was startled by an intruder. She caught the man...
Susan Went To Her Grandparents’ House. On hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Susan went straight to her grandparents’ house to visit her...
The 6th-grade science teacher, Mrs Parks, asked her class, “Which human body part increases to ten times its size when stimulated?” No one answered until little...
A woman walks into a welfare office, trailed by 15 kids: “Wow.” The social worker exclaims. “Are they all yours?” “Yep, they are all mine.” The...
