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Relationship Jokes

Divide Equally

A couple whose marriage was on the rocks sought the advice of their pastor.

The pastor encouraged them to patch up their quarrel and keep their vows, but the couple was adamant.

“Well,” said the pastor, “you know the consequences if you insist on a divorce.

Remember this: you must divide your property equally.”

The wife flared up. “You mean the $4,000 I have saved up? I must give him half? My money?”

“Yes,” said the pastor. “He gets $2,000. You get $2,000.”

“What about my furniture? I paid for that.”

“Same thing,” answered the pastor. “You split it equally.”

There was a challenging gleam in the wife’s eye. “What about our three children?”

The pastor was stumped at first but then quickly came up with a Solomonic solution.

“Go back and live together until your fourth child is born.

Then you take two children and your husband takes two.”

The wife shook her head.

“No, I’m sure that wouldn’t work out. If I depended on him, I wouldn’t have the three I’ve got.”


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