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Relationship Jokes

A guy comes home from the bar drunk


A guy comes home from the bar drunk one night around 3 in the morning.

His wife is sleeping and he is trying to sneak into bed.

He’s laying in bed for a few minutes and cuts a fart.

His wife wakes up and asks, “What the hell was that?”

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He replies, “Touchdown, I am winning 7 nothing.”

She thinks to herself “I’m gonna fix him.”

Then she lets one loose.

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He yells at her, “What was that?”

She replies “Touchdown, tie score.”

Now he thinks, “I’m gonna fix her.”

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He’s laying there for about 10 minutes trying to work one up.

He tries so hard he shits in bed.

The wife asks, “Now what the hell was that?”

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He replied, “Half time, switch sides.”

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