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A disciple went to his master and said, “I have served you faithfully for ten years. Now I have a wish: give me something to eat...
A girl asks her father, “Why does it rain? Is it God sweating or crying?” “No,” says her father, “it rains to make the plants grow....
A drunk staggers out of a bar and runs into two priests. He goes over to the first priest and says, “Dude, I’m Jesus Christ!” And...
An old woman is upset at her husband’s funeral. “You have him in a brown suit and I wanted him in a blue suit.” The mortician...
Two lawyers walking through the woods spotted a vicious looking bear. The first lawyer immediately opened his briefcase, pulled out a pair of sneakers and started...
Three old friends got together and were discussing what movie they had watched when they conceived their children. One lady says she had just watched a...
A woman is at a grocery store. She goes to the clerk to purchase her groceries. The clerk looks at her items and sees a carton...
Tom was at the hospital visiting with his best friend Larry who was dying. Tom asked, “If there is baseball in heaven will you come back...
At the doctor’s office, Tom was getting a check up. “I have good news and bad news,” says the doctor. “The good news is you have...
A child goes to his father and asks, “Father, how do parents think of names for their children?” The father answers, “Well, son, the night before...
Two little boys were known troublemakers, stealing everything they could get their hands, even from the church. One day a priest stopped one of the boys...
So two Irishmen are traveling to Australia. Before they leave home, one of their dads gives them both a bit of advice: “You watch them Aussie...
An old man is met by his attorney, and is told he is going to be audited. He rides to the IRS office with his attorney,...
A husband and wife were driving through Louisiana. As they approached Natchitoches, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town. They argued back and forth,...
A bus full of ugly people had a head on collision with a truck. When they died, God granted all of them one wish. The first...
A boy asks his father, “Dad, are bugs good to eat?” “That’s disgusting. Don’t talk about things like that over dinner,” the dad replies. After dinner...
Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asks a young engineer fresh out of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, “And what starting...
A teacher asked her students to use the word “beans” in a sentence. “My father grows beans,” said one girl. “My mother cooks beans,” said a...
Mr. and Mrs. Brown had two sons. One was named Mind Your Own Business & the other was named Trouble. One day the two boys decided...
A boy with a monkey on his shoulder was walking down the road when he passed a policeman who said, “Now, now young lad, I think...
