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A man is standing outside the gates of Heaven. Saint Peter approaches and says, “Can I help you?” The man replies, “No thanks.” He continues to...
Little Johnny failed his math test dismally. His mark was so bad, his teacher called home to have a word with his dad. When he returned...
A husband takes a pair of his pants, throws them at his wife and says “Put these pants on.” She says to him. “I can’t wear...
A hunter went out to hunt for buffalo. To help him, he hired an Indian Scout. The two of them set off on their journey to...
A newly ordained priest is nervous about hearing confessions and asks an older priest to observe one of his sessions to give him some tips. After...
The little Johnny was waiting for his mother to come out of the grocery store: As he waited, he was approached by a man who asked....
A man and a woman get married, The man tells the woman that he’s an avid deer hunter. The woman says “okay, that’s fine.” Then they...
Two 90-year-old men, Mike and Ted, have been friends all of their lives. When it’s clear that Ted is dying, Mike visits him every day: One...
A couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back and inform the other if it is make love after death. Their biggest fear...
A man went to visit his 90-year-old grandfather in a very secluded rural area of the state he lived in. After spending the night, his grandfather...
A little old lady went to the grocery store and put the most expensive cat food in her basket. She then went to the check out...
An elderly lady went to court for shoplifting. “What is it that you stole?” the judge asked her. “Well, Your Honor, I stole a can of...
A cleaning old woman was applying for a new position. When asked why she left her last employment, she replied, “Yes sir, they paid good wages,...
Mr Johnson had been retired for a year when his wife of 50 years suggested they take a cruise: “We could go somewhere for a week,...
Mr. Wilson comes home one night, and his wife throws her arms around his neck. “I have great news. I’m a month overdue. I think we’re...
A truck driver was going down a steep incline when, at the foot of the hill, he was able to make out a couple having lovemaking...
Two elderly man at a bar had been enjoying a few drinks for the past couple of hours and were pretty drunk when one of them...
An Irishman is in the bar, drinking a pint of Guinness. A lady next To him says, “What a coincidence, I am having Guinness too.” Irish...
A little old lady gets pulled over for speeding. The officer walks up to the car and after a quick greeting takes the documentation she has...
After church, Johnny tells his parents he has to go and talk to the minister right away. They agree and the pastor greets the family. “Pastor,”...
